Deviant Login Shop  Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
×



Details

Submitted on
May 26, 2011
Image Size
1.9 MB
Resolution
4050×2430
Link
Thumb
Embed

Stats

Views
3,243 (2 today)
Favourites
7 (who?)
Comments
5
×
Storyboarding Spongebob by jldelk Storyboarding Spongebob by jldelk
Storyboard assignment requirements:

-use script excerpt from the Mary Tyler Moore Show
-use any Spongebob character/any character you feel comfortable with
-try to stay on model
Add a Comment:
 
:iconshermcohen:
shermcohen May 31, 2011  Professional Filmographer
Hi jdelk -- Your storytelling and acting are very clear, but the way the characters are integrated with the background makes it look really flat. In the first three panels, SpongeBob's head is making a tangent with the floor-line, which makes it look like his head is sort of tangled up in the lines. Take a look at my tutorials on staging at :thumb146070360: and :thumb146846103:

For scene 5, you may want to shift the frame so that there's a bit more space above and to the right of SpongeBob's face so that there's more room for the mobile to enter the frame.

It's hard to say much more than that with just typing; I am set up to do live video critiques online -- weeknights between 8-10pm PST or on weekends. Just let me know which day works for you, and then I'll send you a link for an online video critique.
Reply
:iconjldelk:
jldelk May 31, 2011  Student General Artist
My instructor pointed out the tangent when I turned in the assignment, I just didn't get around to fixing it, but I definitely see what you mean about scene 5. I see what you mean about the flatness with staging, though- one of my weaknesses is not doing enough composition thumbs before I board and I don't always catch myself in the act.

I don't suppose you have or know of a place where I could find script excerpts for boarding exercises? This was one of the first boards I did during the semester and, if possible, I would prefer critique on something a little more recent. Besides- I could always use more practice :)
Reply
:iconshermcohen:
shermcohen May 31, 2011  Professional Filmographer
Here are some animation scripts that may help:
[link]
[link]

For both cartoony shows and action-adventure superhero shows I always recommend taking a simple old-school comic book story that you can find on the web, and re-do the story (with your own characters and staging) in storyboard format. Make sure to pick a short story, and don't copy the pictures...just use it for the simple story. Some good old-fashioned comic book stories are found here:

[link] or [link]
Reply
:iconshermcohen:
shermcohen May 29, 2011  Professional Filmographer
Smart idea to adapt a TV script! If you're interested in a critique let me know :)
Reply
:iconjldelk:
jldelk May 29, 2011  Student General Artist
I will certainly not turn down an opportunity to learn or get better^^ Thank you for any critique you may have!
Reply
Add a Comment: